I'm just going to talk about the author, Souad.
A Muslim, Arab girl who had been tortured as a kid by her father. She was forced to do all the menial work with her sisters. She was also illiterate, since it was "taboo" in her village to educate a girl.
It was almost impossible for her to leave their farmhouse, and if she did, her head had to be down, she would speak to no one, and she would wear no shoes, or else, she would be called "charmuta" (slut) - as mentioned in the book - by the villagers.
Growing up in an extremely narrow-minded village, with a pugnacious father, Souad's one-candle-wish was to get married. It wasn't a fantasy, though, since it was also shameful (in their village) for a wife to go to her parents for help, in case her husband harmed her. Yet, she still wanted to be married to rid herself of her harsh life.
A man named Fayez proposed to her, but she couldn't marry him until her elder sis got married. It was a custom they could not escape.
Souad, curious, spied on Fayez from the terrace while doing some housework.. She tried her best not to be noticeable.
Until one day, he noticed her and made an almost-obvious gesture, wanting to meet her.
Their rendezvous was in a grassy area - where no one would reach.
She mindlessly fell in love with him - and of course she would - since she had been never celebrated for who she was, never thanked, never loved. She probably found a future in his eyes; therefore, he knew she would obey him.
Fayez, the opposite of what Souad thought, after deflowering her, he would still get her to do what he wanted.
After their third sexual intercourse, Souad started feeling giddy, lazy, and heavy..
She wouldn't know she was pregnant of course, she was an illiterate teenager.
Later, a spot appeared on her nose - that was when she knew she was pregnant - since it had appeared on her eldest sister's face when she was pregnant.
Unfortunately, when she went to talk out to who she thought was a lover, he betrayed her..
He avoided her gestures - although he promised to talk to her dad about making the marriage sooner.
She could hide her growing tummy for up to 5 months.. Until it was no longer escapable.
Her parents 'investigated' with her.. she still wouldn't say the truth. They even asked her to prove that she wasn't pregnant by showing them her menstrual blood.
For Souad's surprise, her father did not hit her with his cane nor did he torture her.
Yet, one day, she overheard her parents talking to her brother-in-law about her.. telling him to "do it"
But do what?
She was drowned in fear, awaiting what Hussein (her brother-in-law) would "do"
The next day, while she was washing the clothes..
Hussein showed up.. she didn't raise her eyes, she was ashamed.. embarrassed.. she even preferred to die.
He told her that he would "take care of her"
And it wasn't long until he poured gasoline over her, and lit it.
She ran in flames.. fell unconscious.. and she had no idea who were the women who took her to the hospital.
The more shocking part was that, even in the hospital, no one was allowed to treat her, or any other "charmuta." They were just waiting for her to die, to relieve her family from the shame she had brought to them. They were too hooked on "Honor" not knowing that THAT was the result of their customs and traditions.
Her family, weren't really satisfied with what Hussein did to her. Her mom tried to make her drink a water-like poison.
Luckily, her parents got prohibited from visiting her.
Moving forward, within two weeks (approx.), Souad gave birth, without even knowing that she did.
The baby pushed himself alone, she could only feel mild stabs in her stomach, then a creature between her thighs.
Of course, they took her baby away from her.
One day, Jaqueline, a western humanitarian, heard of Souad's story, and wanted to do anything to help her - although she knew it was almost impossible to do so, since even everyone was pitying Souad's family, and not her.
After a struggle, Jaqueline, with the help of a young doctor, first transferred Souad to another Israeli hospital, where they could actually treat her and not leave her to rot. Second, they went to Souad's family, persuaded them to sign some documents in order to take Souad out of the country (since she was a minor.)
They weren't convinced of course, but they tricked them into thinking that it was going to be better for them to let Souad die far away, and to preserve their so-called dignity.
Also, Jaqueline could finally find Souad's son, Marouan.
With the help of Israelis, Souad's visa and her son's were successful.
Souad, Marouan, and Jaqueline flew to Switzerland, for her therapy.
Souad did not know that there were other countries aside from Palestine. That was how illiterate she was, because of her family.
And that was when her second real life began.
......
Just to make it clear, Islam never put such customs nor traditions, it doesn't even encourage male dominance nor torture.
Such lifestyle does not define our religion, it simply demonstrates the ignorance and narrow-mindedness of some Arab countries. Violating women's rights, torturing and killing.. that is not even close to Islam.
Yes, we do have punishments for committing adultery, but we also have "forgiveness."
As mentioned in Quran:
"Allah accepts the repentance of those who do evil in ignorance"
And, Souad, an ignorant teenager who should've been advised and loved by her parents, who should've been educated to know her own good, who should've been taken care of, is surely not to be punished.
Especially that she was emotionally and mentally victimized by a man who dragged her into doing what she wouldn't have done.
Let me know of what you think
Alia
Problem is - do you think this story is true? The publishers of the French version of this book also brought out a memoir by Mischa Defenseca, Survival with Wolves. The publishers of the English language edition of Burned Alive also had Norma Khouri, author of Forbidden Love, on their list.
ReplyDeleteNumerous questions could be asked about the veracity of the story - don't you find it odd that, in a small Arab village, Souad did not know the name of her next door neighbour? And I am sure you noticed the strange way that descriptions of the house and garden shift about - one moment the garden is open on one side, and in another, it is enclosed in an iron wall, with a lock only on the outside, so that people within can't get out.
The description of the pubic hair removal is the most bizarre sign of someone who is not familiar with Palestinian culture. The women remove the hair "from their sex, but not from their underarms or legs". Say what? They remove hair from the whole body, but it is a private rite. Souad claims her sister's pubic hair was pulled out during the time when wedding visitors were at the house ... oh yeah. She loves to talk about this - she mentions it no less than five times in the memoir, and "can't stop thinking about it." She should have consulted a real Arab woman, to explain what the custom is.
I was oblivious of such details.. But, yes I was kind of shocked.
ReplyDeleteI don't really know much about the Palestinian culture to be honest - especially in that time (30 years ago approx.) But, you might be right, maybe some "spices" were added to the actual story.
Leave this story aside now, we can't deny that such things happen in many Arab countries. Girls who were raised in ignorance grow to want to experience so many things in life then end up being tortured and/or killed.
My point lies in the last 5 paragraphs of this post. This brutality is not only practiced by Muslims, or shouldn't be practiced by them.. Honor killing is practiced in many countries, even in Africa.
So the concentration shouldn't just be on Arabs or Muslims.
Thank you so much for your comment by the way :)